Will Swinging Ruin My Marriage?
The truth is, it probably will. Overall, we’d recommend you not engage in this folly – but if you do, you’ll likely need to hire us to get a divorce. You know, relationships are like a great pair of vintage jeans: If they don’t fit, they won’t make you happy. One thing we know for sure is that, also like amazing denim, there are lots of different types of relationships. Love is definitely not one-size-fits-all. One type of relationship getting a lot of buzz lately is an open one, but what does that really mean?
Should You Have An Open Relationship?
An open relationship is one in which both parties aren’t exclusively dating each other. In other words, both people are openly allowed to have other sexual and/or romantic partners. Basically, if you’re in an open relationship, you’re cool with you and your partner having other love interests. Look, all relationships are different, but the one thing that defines them is whether or not both parties are exclusively seeing each other or not. The whole point of being in a relationship is to enjoy yourself and your partner in whatever context works for you. If you both feel like your relationship would do better if you open it up, go for it. If you’ve spent your whole life in monogamous relationships, an open one may feel a little strange, but don’t worry, you’ll get used to it (and might even wonder why you never tried this earlier!) You may feel a little guilty the first time you hook up with someone who isn’t your main man or lady, but try to let those feelings go because you’re not doing anything wrong.
Is Honesty Really Is the Best Policy?
The only way an open relationship will work is if you’re both totally honest with each other. Like a monogamous relationship, you’ll discuss what you’re both comfortable with when you define the relationship. People who don’t really understand the concept of open relationships may make you feel like you’re just getting permission to cheat on your partner, but here’s why they’re wrong: Open relationships grant both of you the freedom to pursue other people in a way that’s based on mutual respect, open communication, and total honesty. In other words, you fully trust each other. While you still have strong feelings for your primary partner, you’re still able to have different sexual needs met with different people, all while being completely truthful and open with one another. We truly believe that the hallmark of a successful relationship is being able to tell each other anything.
Should You Clear Your Schedule?
No matter how many or few partners you have, you’ll need to be able to make time for all of them. Regardless of whether you’re going out for a long and leisurely dinner or just heading to their apartment for a quick hookup, you will probably need to keep a few nights open every week. Just like any other relationship, an open one requires time and effort. For some couples, it means one main partner and other less significant partners, and for other couples, it means that both parties can have other full-blown relationships. Take some time to figure out what works for you, but either way, open relationships are a time commitment.
Make Sure You Feel Your Feelings
Even if you’re super open-minded, accepting, and trusting, you may still feel a pang of jealousy when your partner comes home after a night spent with one of their other lovers. Jealousy is a strong feeling that may be hard to ignore, so don’t try to pretend you’re fine if you’re not. Believe it or not, it’s not uncommon for people in an open relationship to feel a bit threatened or intimidated by the different people their partner may pursue. Some of us might aspire to be successful at consensual non-monogamy and that, too, requires certain personality dispositions and interpersonal skills like overcoming jealousy and insecurity about consensual partner sharing
Don’t Expect a Quick-Fix
Whether it was on television or in real life, we’ve all seen a couple have a baby in the hopes of repairing their relationship, but that never works. If a relationship is doomed to fail, nothing will be able to fix it because it’s simply not meant to be. Like a baby, an open relationship can’t save a failing connection. In fact, opening up a weak relationship will probably destroy it. If you want an open relationship to have any chance of succeeding, you need to establish a strong and sturdy foundation first. If you’re already feeling pretty insecure about where your connection stands, hooking up with other people won’t help. Although the majority of swinging will end up involving lovemaking and getting frisky with each other’s partners, it isn’t all about just that. Swinging is about building up the atmosphere of warmth and belonging. Whether you are at a party with another couple or with another person for a threesome, you will be having a great time eating, drinking and chatting. To get into the comfort zone, building camaraderie with someone is essential to get down on the knees later. Swingers can differentiate between fun and friendship. The love and companionship provided by their existing relationship is bare and transparent. There are no rough edges anywhere and they make sure of that or there may be trouble. Thus, though swingers may have many sexual relationships, only a single emotional relationship exists. Although close friendships are formed within the community, swingers often feel nothing is more important than their own partner. The friendships and companionship among swingers strengthen the primary stem of the relationship rather than damage it.
How can Swinging help your Relationship?
Swingers lay claim that lovemaking is more intimate because they are with a partner who encourages their fantasies. The partner is so confident that jealousy is not an issue. Swingers also vouch that swinging makes infidelity less likely, as they know they can have physical contact with others with their partner’s consent. Various responses exist to those who object to swinging on the basis of faith. Many swingers feel their activities in their own homes or private clubs are not for others’ justification. Others believe that as long as they consider their relationships sacred, playing does not contradict the sanctity and is consistent with spiritual values. Two additional considerations should be made when it comes to swinging. The first is that the couple defines cheating. As long as the couple have a definition and stay within their boundaries, no cheating would occur. Secondly, some argue that adultery is incongruent with the original definition. Another common response to moral and philosophical objections is that there is a difference between physical intimacy and love. Contradictorily, this is one of the objections that religious groups have, that this distinction should not exist, meaning both physical intimacy and love should be the same physical agenda.
Tell The Truth
Be truthful and honest when you talk to your partner about your feelings. If you feel jealous of your partner, or have any other uncomfortable feelings about the whole sexual step, tell your partner. If you don’t, they will only come out later and be much more awkward and damaging. Once you get to the swingers’ joint, be yourself and don’t pretend to be someone else. Being friendly, good-natured and exuding a warm aura has a positive effect on everyone. Leaving your inhibitions at home, both physical and social is a must as it can interfere with your swinging pleasure. You can’t expect to get much out of a swingers’ party if you aren’t prepared to put much in. Stay close to your partner but not in a clingy way as it may ward off others from approaching either of you. Know your needs, interests and desires and let everyone know about them. Practice safe sex and don’t go beyond limits, even if you intend to try new things.
Don’t take a Ticket
Don’t take a ‘ticket’ to a swingers’ party (a ticket is the one who goes just to get you in and not to take part). Don’t disturb the swinging pleasures of others. Don’t be rude and try to cheat or lie. Don’t give personal details to anyone at the party if you aren’t comfortable. Don’t be vague about your desires. Don’t cross other people’s limits. Swinging isn’t for everyone. People need to discuss between themselves, the different factors including jealousy, self-esteem, or any relationship problems, prior to entering into the swinging lifestyle. If any of these areas are of major concern to either person, then chances are, you aren’t ready to enjoy the swinging lifestyle and all of its benefits. It is to be noted that swinging is to enhance your relationship, not to repair or rebuild it. A couple receptive to new and different sexual experiences will begin to explore different avenues of shared sexual fulfillment to continue to grow together. Couples who want to find a way to reconnect physically and emotionally are more likely to make it through a swingers’ party together. It provides sexual variety, adventure, and the opportunity to live out fantasies as a couple without secrecy and deceit. But never ever join a swinging community and use that as an excuse to cheat on your partner. Swinging, if done respectfully, can enhance your relationship by can enhance your relationship by a mile. But then again, it is wicked ideas like these that make sentences like the next one appear. Do it if you want, stay away if you want, because indulgences like these really are to each their own!
Dissolution of Marriage In Utah
In most states, “dissolution of marriage” is just another way of saying “divorce,” and it refers to the process by which a couple can end their marriage permanently. In a few states, however, a dissolution of marriage is not the same as a divorce, because it does not permanently terminate marital status or because it can only be used for certain cases, such as where a couple agrees to the dissolution and agrees on how everything will be resolved (for example, alimony and division of property). Couples can dissolve their marriages by choosing a “no-fault” or “fault” divorce. A “no-fault” divorce is one where spouses seek to end their marriage without assessing any blame or fault. In other words, the spouse that requests the divorce (the “filing” spouse) doesn’t need to accuse the other spouse of bad behavior, which led to the separation. Instead, the filing spouse can list a “no-fault” reason for the divorce, such as “irreconcilable differences,” which is just a fancy way of saying the couple can’t get along anymore, and there is no real chance that they will get back together. A no-fault divorce is easier and quicker to obtain than a “fault” divorce, but spouses may be required to live apart for a certain amount of time. The specific requirements for a no-fault divorce will depend on the laws of the state where the divorce action is filed.
In a “fault” divorce, the filing spouse’s request to end the marriage is based on a claim that the other spouse engaged in a specific type of misconduct, which led to the breakup. Grounds for a fault divorce vary from state to state, but some of the most common are adultery, physical or emotional abuse, abandonment, and drug or alcohol addiction. Fault divorces are more contentious and stressful for all involved (including any children of the marriage), and they generally cost more in attorney’s fees because of all the time spent trying to prove allegations of bad behavior. Historically, this was a very common way to dissolve a marriage, but today, most states have either abandoned fault grounds or added no-fault options for divorce.
Dissolution of marriage can be challenging on many levels, because it involves potentially complex and emotionally-charged issues, such as child custody and support, division of property and debts, and alimony (also known as “spousal support” or “maintenance”). As a result, spouses considering dissolution of marriage should seek legal advice; an experienced family law attorney can explain each of these legal issues and how they may play out in your particular case. In addition, an attorney can prepare all necessary divorce paperwork and ensure that your rights are fully protected, whether you end up settling all issues with your spouse (outside of court) or going through a full-blown divorce trial.
Free Initial Consultation with Lawyer
It’s not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when. Legal problems come to everyone. Whether it’s your son who gets in a car wreck, your uncle who loses his job and needs to file for bankruptcy, your sister’s brother who’s getting divorced, or a grandparent that passes away without a will -all of us have legal issues and questions that arise. So when you have a law question, call Ascent Law for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you!
8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C
West Jordan, Utah
84088 United States
Telephone: (801) 676-5506